An Astronaut vs. An Alien

Point of fact: When it comes to Aliens, the ratio of ugly to friendly is inversely proportionate. In other words, the uglier an Alien is, the friendlier it will be. Unfortunately, Astronauts don't know this. Because Astronauts lack this knowledge, these two will never get the chance to be best buddies.

A Leprechaun vs. A Polar Bear

If there's one thing Polar Bears can't resist, it's Leprechaun gold. And if there's one thing Leprechauns can't resist, it's Polar Bear gold. Some of the most epic battles in history have been between these two mortal enemies fighting over each others precious treasures. In fact, contrary to popular belief, the Great Chicago Fire of 1871 wasn't caused by a cow tipping over a lantern, but by a Leprechaun falling asleep while smoking a victory pipe after one such battle.

True story.

Mr. T vs. Godzilla

Four simple words:

I pity the fool.

Colonel Sanders vs. Kate Moss

The Colonel knows that his Original Recipe chicken is both delicious and an excellent way to stop Kate Moss from sucking your blood.

A Pirate vs. Sea Biscuit

Although last Friday, September 19th, was National Talk Like a Pirate Day, pirates are more than willing to fight anyone, anywhere, on any day of the year.

Hulk Hogan vs. Kermit the Frog

Although he may be small of stature, Kermit the Frog is a Kung Fu master. This is a drawing of just moments before Kermit unleashed a beating that the Hulkster won't soon forget.

George Washington vs. George Burns

He may be one of the founding fathers of the United States of America, but even one of our countries greatest Presidents had his pet peeves. Rumor has it that he really hated old people, cigar smoke and canes. You can imagine the carnage that ensued when he came across George Burns on one of his daily afternoon strolls.

Phil Collins vs. A Robot

You might think the winner of this battle would be a no-brainer. You might think that the robot would tear Phil Collins limb from limb. However, when Phil Collins goes on a city-destroying rampage, don't say I didn't warn you.

Lisa Simpson vs. OJ Simpson

This is the battle that started it all. With a little help from Cris, Neepun, Caroline and Hillary, I was able to see just how important (and brilliant) my ideas were. I wish I could say that I'll remember you four when I get rich and famous... but I can't.

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Battles of Epic Proportion.

Hello minions. Before I unleash on the world what might possibly be the most innovative and thought provoking blog content man has ever known, I thought it would be appropriate for me to introduce myself. My name is Andrew King and I am the author of Battles of Epic Proportion. Using only a pen, a sticky note, my uncanny ability to draw, and some spare time, I have created the "Next Big Thing" in blogging. If you have a weak heart or a weak stomach, this is not the place for you, so please click here to be taken to someplace a little more appropriate. For those of you that are still here and are prepared for the mayhem, buckle up, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

You have been warned.