Saturday, January 17, 2009

Prince vs. a Bird

Those people that have only ever seen Prince on television have no idea just how tiny he actually is. At birth, he was just a quarter of an inch long and weighed slightly less than an ounce. Even today, he is barely an inch and a half tall and weighs only as much as a pad of medium sized Post-It notes. His whole life has been spent avoiding dangers that you and I don't even realize are there. Things like cracks in sidewalks, storm drains, and yes, even birds. Especially birds. To defend himself against these winged foes, he has developed a guitar style that, while pleasing to you and I, is virtually unbearable to creatures of the avian variety.

Rock on little Prince. Rock on.

Friday, January 9, 2009

A Ninja vs. Gallagher

Ninjas and watermelons are sworn enemies. Gallagher isn't the biggest fan of watermelons either. What should be a catalyst for the unification of all things Ninja and all things Gallagher may eventually lead to the demise of one of the aforementioned parties. Unfortunately for both sides, Gallagher's comedy specials featuring his signature move of smashing watermelons are never shown on Japanese television because of the language barrier. Because of this, Ninjas believe that Gallagher is the King of All Watermelons rather than a fellow watermelon-hater. We can only hope that one day Ninjas and Gallagher will iron out their differences. The world would be a better place for it my friends. The world would be a better place for it.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Frida Kahlo vs. Frito Lay

The story goes that in 1951, while eating a bag of Frito Lay Brand Santitas Authentic Mexican Style Tortilla Chips, Frida Kahlo noticed what she perceived to be an astounding likeness between herself and the woman on the bag. Shortly thereafter, she sued Frito Lay saying that they had violated her Personality Rights, or her right to keep her image and likeness from being commercially exploited without permission or contractual compensation. Later that year after many hard-fought court battles where Kahlo represented herself, Frito Lay settled out of court awarding Kahlo a small fortune in tortilla chip royalties. If Frito Lay had known of Kahlo’s encyclopedic knowledge of Civil Law sooner, they may have saved themselves millions of dollars in legal fees.