Frankenstein vs. Frank 'n' Beans

Little known fact: Frankenstein is terrified of legumes. They give him awful gas.

Ellen Degeneres vs. Owen Wilson

Despite the fact that they are identical twins, these two have incredible contempt for each other. I guess it's sibling rivalry or something. And because they share exactly the same genes, this could possibly turn out to be the most epic battle of all time. The Perfect Storm. Two shall enter, one shall leave.

Mario vs. Michael Jackson

Mario has the distinct advantage because Michael Jackson spends entirely too much time grabbing his crotch and pointing at things.

Keith Richards vs. A Mummy

Predicting the winner of this battle is more than just a little difficult. On one hand, you have ancient wisdom, eons of experience and supernatural power. And on the other hand you have a Mummy.

Get it?!

Because Keith Richards is old!

Anyway, I'd have to say that in the end, Keith Richards would prove the victor because he can't be killed. And because Mummies aren't real.

Steve Irwin vs. Steve Urkell

If there’s one thing Australians love more than the Bloomin’ Onion at Outback Steakhouse and khaki clothing, it’s tormenting nerds. Mr. Urkell is in for a long day.

A Caveman vs. Oprah

The idea of a woman being both wealthy and powerful doesn’t sit well with Cavemen, but you can’t fault them for their patriarchal views of a woman’s place in society… they’re only cavemen after all.